Damaged
by Your-hollywood-tragedyx3
Summary: But eventually, the lines blurred together and the things she tried so hard to hide and escape from, came rushing out like a waterfall. And if Paige Matthews was certain about one thing, it was this-that once the truth's out there, it hurts like a bitch.
1. Part I

**Author's Note: **I started writing this about two weeks ago or so, when I had nothing better to do other than question my sanity during English class. I honestly have no idea where I want to go with this, mainly because so much shit is floating around in my head right now that I can't decipher what's what, but do I care? Not really. Read this at your own will, it's intense. Leave me a note in the little review box if you like it, hell-leave me one if you don't. I don't care. Shit happens. The first chapter will be relatively short, just getting a glimpse into what's about to unfold for the Halliwell's. This takes place during season six(no specific episode, with mentions of the episode; 'A Paige from the past,' included.)

**Disclaimer: **Sadly, I own nothing. The people, locations and scripts belong in the creator's toy box where they will forever stay.

**Warning: **I will say this once, and only once, this story deals with intense subject matter (which will be divulged later on) but as a result of that-I suggest those who do not like dark topics, go elsewhere. Also, events have been changed for my own reasoning (nothing serious, just minor, things) so please do not point out that _this_ isn't right or _that_ isn't how it goes, because yes-I am aware of that-but I changed it for a reason, for the story to work.

….

_Her life had become one vicious cycle that she couldn't escape. Her days consisted of hiding the truth from her family while her nights consisted of letting her mind wonder into a place she never wanted to go back too. It wasn't something she enjoyed by any means, but it's something she __**needed**__ to do. It was all about the control, the secrets she hid, the pain that gripped viciously at her heart. But eventually the lines blurred together and everything came spilling out and if Paige Matthews was certain about one thing, it was that once the truth was out there-it hurt like a bitch._

….

_**Six months earlier…**_

"Paige, can you come down here please?" The voice of her eldest sister rang through her ears as she tore her eyes away from the mirror in the bathroom. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear as she exhaled slowly, shaking the mass of thoughts from her head. Turning swiftly on her heel, she opened the door and quickly stepped into the hallway of the halliwell manor. It took her no more than a minute to descend the stairs and cross the living room into the kitchen. Piper stood at the counter throwing various food substances into the pot while Phoebe sat on one of the bar stools, tapping away on her cell phone. "Okay," Paige murmured, clearing her throat. "I'm here, what's going on?"

Piper and Phoebe both stopped what they were doing simultaneously and glanced up at the red head, nerves evident in their eyes. "It's about time you woke up, sleepy head." Piper joked half heartedly before stealing a glance at Phoebe who was eying her suspiciously. "Paige," Piper continued a moment later, voice cautious. "There's something you should know."

Nodding her head, Paige shifted on her heels, swallowing the lump in her throat as she waited for her eldest sister to continue on. "Paige, while you were asleep-one of the Elder's payed us a visit. They told us they wanted to repay us for all of the good we've done." Confusion evident, Paige adverted her attention to Phoebe who had gone back to typing away at her phone. Her tone was dry with a bit of an edge to it and Paige winced lightly. "What Piper here is trying to say, is that they offered to bring back a few people from our past. Specifically, Grams, mom, Prue, and Andy. Andy is Prue's old beau, and Darryl's ex partner." Nodding again, Paige decided to remain silent for a few minutes-sensing that this conversation was _far_ from over.

"Paige," Her head snapped up at the sound of Piper's voice. "Say something, honey. We need to know if you're alright about this." It took her a moment to really process anything, she actually had to blink a few times to make sure she wasn't still asleep. It felt so surreal, but as the shock slowly began to set in, she found the words falling from her lips. "…What? I mean, why? Is that even _possible_? _Hell,_ is that even _legal_?" Phoebe snorted, causing Paige to whip her head around. "Paige, I'm pretty sure _none_ of the things we do concerning magic are legal. However, you have every right to be confused. Hell, I'm confused and I was there!"

Sighing, Piper dropped her face into her hands, muttering a drawn out, 'Pheebs,' under her breath. It didn't go unnoticed by either sister and Phoebe instantly spoke back up. "I'm telling the truth Piper!" She shouted angrily, her voice reverberating off the walls of the halliwell manor. "Something doesn't add up! How can the Elder's just pop in here after all these years and tell us they're sending back the people we love most? The same damn people they took away in the _first_ place!"

"Pheebs," Piper began, sarcasm ringing through. "The Elder's didn't take them away, demons did." Sighing in frustration, Phoebe shook her head before continuing with her rant, seeming to have forgotten Paige was even standing in the room. "You know what I mean, damn it! It just doesn't make sense!"

"Phoebe," Piper interjected. "You're angry, I get that…" But Phoebe refused to let Piper finish that sentence, quickly intercepting. "Damn right I'm angry Piper and you should be too! Don't get me wrong, I love them to death and I miss them all _so_ much, but how the hell do the Elder's even plan on pulling this off? How long are they staying? I'm not about to get close to them if they're only going to be snatched away again!"

"Well," Piper began slowly, once she was sure Phoebe had finished her rant. "Why don't you ask them yourself?" Arching an eyebrow, Phoebe turned on her heel to where Piper had pointed towards the doorway of the kitchen. Her body stiffened almost immediately when she saw Grams, her mother, her eldest sister Prue, and long time family friend, Andy standing before her. Her anger instantly melted away into utter surprise as the words fell like rain from her mouth. "Well," She muttered under her breath. "That was fast."


	2. Part II

**Author's Note: **Glad so many of you are enjoying this, I was sort of antsy about putting this up because I'm a stickler for detail and the first chapter was mainly dialogue. But regardless of that, I hope you enjoy this next chapter-if not, I'm alright with that too. Haha.

**Warning: **I've decided to change something around in order for the story to work. Instead of Paige being given to the Matthew's straight away, she was put into another foster home until she was thirteen(due to issues that will be divulged later on,) then went from there to the Matthew's where she resided until the car accident.

….

"So," Piper spoke moments later as she made a feeble attempt to break the silence. "How long are you staying?" The four shared glances, small smiles falling upon their faces.

"Permanently," Penny spoke, gaining the looks of two confused woman and one who had yet to say anything at all and seemed to be on the verge of passing out.

Sensing that this conversation should probably be moved elsewhere, Patty clapped her hands together and in a rather chipper tone, spoke up. "How about we move this conversation into the living room so that we can all get a little more comfortable and so Paige here doesn't pass out." A light chuckle escaped Patty's throat as Piper and Phoebe glanced over at their youngest sister, all nodding their heads in agreement.

Walking around the counter, Piper lightly grabbed hold of Paige's forearm, guiding her swaying baby sister into the living room and placing her delicately in a chair before she took her own seat on the couch. Once everyone else had settled in, Patty continued. "Well girls, the Elder's have decided that due to all the good you've done…" Phoebe cut her off almost immediately.

"We know that part mom, we just want, no, we _need_ to know how any of this is even possible. I mean, aren't all of you well…dead?" Penny smiled, shaking her head at Phoebe's slight confusion, hoping that she could make this just a little clearer for everyone else in the room. "We _were_ dead," She began.

"And now?" Piper questioned.

"Now dear, we're alive and well."

"But how," Piper continued. "How is that even possible?"

Smiling, Gram's cleared her throat and continued. "Well dear, we're witches…anything is possible. But with a little memory dust, no one aside from close family and friends, for example Darryl, will know that any of us ever died. To them, we were merely on a…well, a sabbatical of sorts."

Piper and Phoebe exchanged surprised glances, their lips turning upward. "This is great!" Phoebe piped up suddenly, the anger from before having dissipated completely. Jumping to her feet, she rushed towards her grandmother and her mother, scooping them up into warm, tight embraces-ones that were very much needed as Piper turned her attention towards the raven haired woman who was sitting beside a rather calm Andy. "Prue," She whispered, still in slight disbelief as she locked eyes with her eldest sister. Slowly pushing herself up and onto her feet, she shuffled lightly across the carpet, walking towards the woman. Prue smiled, standing up as Piper reached her before pulling her younger sister into a hug, molding their bodies together as Piper sobbed quietly into her shirt.

Paige, on the other hand, remained silent-a rather stoic expression set upon her face. She had yet to say a single word, mainly due to the fact she had no idea _what_ to say. Everything was happening so fast, _too_ fast, and she wasn't quite sure what to make of it all. Her head was running a thousand miles a minute and her stomach was swimming with fear, butterflies, and anger and she had to clench and unclench her hands in an effort to stay composed. She honestly wasn't sure why she was so angry, well actually, that was a lie because she _did_ know, but she wasn't about to admit why that was. Not yet anyway, or maybe not at all. She wasn't quite sure, but she did happen to pick up her mother's concerned glance out of the corner of her eye.

Patty watched her youngest daughter, curious as to just what was going through her head. She wanted desperately to pull Paige into her arms and just hold her, while whispering apologies profusely in her ear, but at the same time she didn't want to scare her. Although, she figured this has got to be scary enough either way. Deciding to stay put, she made an effort to advert her eyes, this time towards Phoebe, who had switched places with Piper and was now curled up into Prue's arms while Piper discussed the all too famous topic between them (cooking) with Grams.

However, despite best efforts, Patty found her gaze traveling back to Paige, _always _back to Paige, before her feet decided to join in and carry her towards her daughter. She sat delicately on the arm of the chair her youngest daughter was residing in, and swallowed the lump of fear in her throat as she did her best to keep her voice even while speaking. "Hi sweetie," Her mother's voice rang through her ears, but they were distant and carried a buzzing sound to them. Paige chewed (a nervous habit she picked up) on her lip, glancing up at her mother. She could feel a light tingle on her lips as a single word (which she sincerely hoped was something akin to a 'hello,') fell out but she didn't pay much attention to it. Her mind was everywhere but nothing seemed to come together. What did this mean for the power of three? She wondered silently. Did that mean they were now the power of four? Was that even _possible_?

To be honest, she had no idea but she had so many damn questions in her head that she wanted to ask-she just wasn't quite sure where to start. Before she could even contemplate this or try to sort at least _one_ thing out, her mother's voice broke through her thoughts, her barrier. "You've been awfully quiet over here honey, are you alright? I mean, what do _you_ think of all of this?"

Swallowing the snowball in her throat, Paige blinked a few times before running a hand through her hair. The room instantly fell silent and she could feel a thousand sets of eyes on her, burning holes into her skin. "I…I don't know," She choked out, voice laced with fear and tears. Abruptly, she stood to her feet, shaking her head. "I…I'm sorry, I can't do this right now. I have to go." Pushing her body forward, she found herself running out of the living room towards the front doors and eventually out of the house and onto the street, ignoring the calls from Phoebe behind her.

….

A sad sigh escaped Piper's lips as she glanced back at her mother and then at Phoebe, who had now resumed her position beside Prue. "Let her go, Pheeb's." Piper cooed softly. "She needs time to herself right now, she'll be back later on."

Nodding her head, Phoebe curled back up against the raven haired woman's shoulder, the room a sudden deathly silence. Phoebe had a feeling this was getting to Paige a little more than she let on, but seeing as she could do nothing but wait, she let sleep take over her body and closed her eyes. She was out cold in less than a minute.

….

Her legs ached and her chest heaved but she refused to stop running. She was afraid of what would happen if she did, although in the back of her mind she was wondering why the hell she didn't just orb or better yet, take her damn car. It would've been much easier. Shaking the thought from her head, she blinked back tears-wanting, _needing_ to get as far away from everything and everyone else as possible. After about another five minutes, her destination (which truly surprised her) came into view.

She felt herself slowing down as she drug her body down the stairs before her knees buckled and she went down, her face meeting soft, grainy material. Wiping the stinging sensation that was both a mixture of tears and sweat from her eyes, she glanced around her. She was at the beach a few miles away from the manor. Pulling her body into a seated position, she let the day's events seep into her skin as she felt a fresh set of hot, salty tears running like faucets from her eyes.

She hated this, she hated feeling so out of control-and that's exactly what all of this _was_. A lack of control. With shaking limbs, she willed herself to calm down. A soothing breath left her as she forced herself to focus on something else. Closing her eyes, she decided to turn her attention towards the water. The sound of the waves crashing into the rocks was soothing to Paige and as she sat there engrossed in her thoughts, she hadn't realized the sound of shuffling footsteps behind her until a hand on her shoulder caused her to jump up.

It took her a moment to notice who it was but once she did, she felt instantly relieved it was a demon. She wasn't sure if she had it in her to fight any today. "Can I sit?" The voice is soft and delicate, and Paige feels shivers run down her spine as she nods her head absentmindedly. "I know I'm most likely the last person you'd like to see right now, but I think it's important that we talk, meet formally you know? After all, you're my sister too."

Paige bites down on the inside of her cheek as she exhales through her nose. "And vice versa," Prue continues. A knowing sigh escapes Paige as she nods her head, trying to advert her eyes, to look anywhere but at _her_. It takes her a moment but the words fall from her lips in utter defeat.

"Okay."

Taking a seat beside the red head, Prue looks out over the ocean, finding it rather ironic and a bit surprising that she'd find Paige here, of all places. If anything, she assumed she'd be at the club. As she tries to piece together what she wants to say to the youngest Halliwell, she wrings her hands together in a nervous fit. "Paige," She begins again, sighing softly. "I know how overwhelming this must be for you, and believe me; it's overwhelming for the rest of us as well." She stopped however, when Paige elicited a disbelieving scoff followed by a roll of her eyes. "I'm not back here to take your place. Well, to be honest, I'm not entirely sure _why_ I'm back here." She mumbles, chuckling lightly under her breath. As she was about to start speaking again, she heard a faint, barely audible whisper elicit the red head's throat. "How'd you find me?"

A small smile grazes Prue's face as she continues to stare out at the ocean ahead of her. "When Gram's was alive, you know…the _first _time, she used to bring us here. I remember she brought us here after mom's funeral; I refused to get out of the car. Grams threatened to put me in time out if I didn't get out, but I just couldn't picture having fun without mom. I was too angry, too hurt. I swore to myself though, that after that day I was never going to come back here, but I found myself breaking that vow every single time I needed time to myself, somewhere to get away from it all and that's how I knew you were here. We're a lot alike, a lot more than you'd think."

As Paige takes the time to process what Prue has said, Prue stands to her feet, heading towards the water, a pleased expression on her face. It wasn't exactly what she had _planned_ to say, but it worked none-the-less. Paige, on the other hand, had grown rather confused. They had just spent the last half hour talking, or rather, Prue talked and Paige listened half heartedly, and now Prue wanted to go for a swim? What the _hell_? "The funny thing about all of this is the fact that I used to be terrified of the water. After mom's death, I refused to be anywhere near it." She recalled absentmindedly, her voice echoing back to where Paige was still seated.

"But you said Gram's used to bring you, Piper and Phoebe here?" She questioned, pushing herself to her feet as she, too, walked towards the water where Prue was standing, knee deep in the rather calm waves. The overwhelming fear and anxiety Paige was feeling began to melt away as she felt herself warming up to her eldest her sister. "She did, but I always stayed in the sand, far away from the water as possible." Nodding her head in understanding, Paige shutter's lightly at the water's temperature. "I see," She mumbles, half heartedly as she runs a hand through her hair. The water seemed to wash some sense into Paige as she listened to the raven haired woman speak up again, asking her a question she herself, had been wondering all along. "Paige, will you come home? Please? Despite what you think, your family needs you."

Licking her lips, Paige quickly glances away, nerves evident. "I…I'm not sure if I can…not right now." She croaked, feeling that overwhelming sensation of hurt and anger flow back into her, coursing wildly through her veins. Whipping her head around, Prue found herself growing rather angry as she reached out and grasped hold of the younger woman's wrist firmly, tugging Paige closer to her. "Why the hell not?" She hissed.

As her jaw dropped in shock, Paige ripped her wrist out of the raven haired woman's grasp, her anger growing rapidly until she was shouting. "Because I can't!" She retorted in frustration, her eyes swimming with tears. "Why not?" Prue repeated, her tone subsequently softer than it had been before and swimming with concern.

Paige shook her head before turning away from Prue and heading back towards the shoreline. "Paige!" Prue called, trailing behind her as she tried to think of any reason as to why her baby sister was refusing to come home. "Paige, please…talk to me. Why can't you come home?" She whispered, feeling rather helpless, a feeling that Prue hated with a burning passion. Sighing in annoyance, Paige turned back towards her eldest sister and crossed her arms over her chest. "Because," She mumbled, glancing down at her feet. "Because I just can't…" She pauses for a minute as she makes an effort (and fails mercilessly) to blink back tears. "Because I can't…I can't face mom." She chokes out; the answer to Prue's long awaited questioned bringing her a mixture of relief, concern and confusion.

"Why not?" She found herself asking the red head. Paige shifted on her feet, not wanting to admit the _real_ reason. "Paige," Prue tried again, cautiously, only stopping when she saw Paige shake her head and back away from her.

Clenching her fists together again, Paige lost it-her anger and rage finally exploding from inside of her as hot tears poured down her face. "She gave me up, Prue! God, you don't understand! I've always been so _fucking angry_ with her because of it and you…you just don't know what its like! You've never dealt with something like that before! You don't know the hell that went on in the foster home I was in so don't sit there and pretend that you do!"

Before Prue could even open her mouth, Paige had disappeared in a swirl of blue orbs, leaving the raven haired woman alone, shocked, and ultimately terrified. She'd just returned to earth, and she already had one sister who hated her, _fantastic._


	3. Part III

"Well?" Piper asked the moment she saw the raven haired woman step through the door. "Did you get her?" Sighing unhappily, Prue shook her head, still in a state of shock. Piper swallowed the lump forming in her throat as she nodded her head, she too, unhappy that Paige did not return with her eldest sister. She didn't understand why she even ran out in the _first_ place, but by the look on Prue's face, Piper could tell that the raven haired woman _did _know.

Now if she could just get her to say something.

….

It was early in the day but Paige found herself sitting in a rather vacant P3, drinking a bottle of jack in the VIP lounge where she was normally accompanied by her sister's. When the club was open, that is. She found it ironic that despite wanting to get _away_ from her sister's, from her family, she came to the most obvious place there was. She found it more ironic that she was drinking again, something she'd refused to do since her last foster family died in a car accident brought _on_ by none other than a drunk driver.

Her heart felt as if it was now in her stomach, and she had to fight mercilessly to stop shaking and stay composed. It wasn't easy by any means, but she found the jack slowly beginning to work. That is, until it didn't and she began to relive the memories she'd tried so desperately to lock away and ultimately banish.

The first one started off slowly but Paige soon found herself clutching the bottle tighter in her hand, sipping faster and without care as the liquid burned a bitter sweet fire down her throat. She was five when it _first_ happened, but it was still as vivid as ever. She had been in and out of homes since she had been dropped off at the local church by her birth parents, but she always found herself back in that same place, with _him_.

After all, who wanted to believe a little kid? They were notorious for 'telling stories,' at their age.

It wasn't so bad in the beginning; the foster family she was placed into seemed rather nice. That is, until she learned of their secrets. Two weeks after she had been placed into their care, she caught her 'mother' shooting up in the bathroom, while her 'father,' for all intents and purposes, drank into a stupor in his office downstairs. She just pretended not to know anything, pretended nothing _bad_ was going on, but as soon as her 'mom,' was locked away, unconscious in her bedroom, and her father was creeping his way into her room, she couldn't pretend any longer.

….

"_Where the hell are you, you little brat!" His angry voice boomed, echoing throughout the house. She could hear his footsteps approaching clearly as she hid under the sheets in her bed, praying silently that for just one night, he'd leave her alone. But as the door knob turned, she knew that it was merely another lost cause. She knew what was coming, what was going to happen. "Oh Paigey, come out, come out wherever you are. I know you're In here."_

_The menacing tone brought tears to her eyes as she tried desperately to swallow the lump in her throat. However, she failed and with failure came a price, and for Paige that price was spending the next nine years as his prisoner in his own hell. _

As she let out a shaky breath, she discarded the now empty bottle of jack before stumbling back to the VIP lounge, landing on the couch with a loud thud. A loud 'oomph,' escaped her throat as she felt a bout of sharp, intense pain course through her body. Closing her eyes, she exhaled slowly and slid back into her memories, each one more vicious and heartbreaking than the next.

_She could feel him hovering over her as he pulled the sheets back, the smell of scotch evident on his breath. "Don't be scared, Paigey, Daddy's here." Cringing at his words, Paige tried desperately to dig herself deeper into her mattress, hoping that if she could mold herself far enough into it, she'd disappear altogether. As he leaned forward, however, Paige scooted further away, terrified. She was teetering on the edge of the bed until he grabbed her wrist in a vice grip, pulling her towards him until his lips collided with hers. Even her five year old self knew this was wrong, but did it stop? No._

_When he was around her, time seemed to pass rather slowly. Despite his cruel intentions, he undressed her with care. Well, as much care as a rapist __**could**__ have. But once 5 year old Paige was naked and laying in bed with hot tears pouring from her eyes, that "care," flew out the window and soon he was ripping her apart piece by piece. Unfortunately for her though, it did not stop then. No, no-it didn't stop until she was fourteen and she was finally taken out of that miserable hell hole and put into another home, the Matthew's._

_It wasn't bad at the Matthew's, at least she didn't feel as if she was being torn apart from the inside out countless times a night. However, due to the fact that they knew about her last foster home, her past, they didn't want to let her out of their site, either. Which for Paige was a nuisance. She understood that they care, that they didn't want to see her in that horrible, helpless, position ever again and for that-she truly loved them, but regardless she wanted at least some freedom. She needed it, to bury the memories that still burned behind her retinas. _

_She figured, if they wouldn't give it to her, she'd take it-and that she did. She started sneaking out, going to parties, skipping school, drinking, doing drugs, doing whatever she could do to feel at least a little bit of normality. But it never seemed to work. She cursed at the people that she actually could think of as her parents, telling them they were worthless, that she hated them and that they weren't __**really**__ her family. She didn't know how wrong she was until it was too late, until she was watching another car heading right towards them, until she was screaming for her father to watch out, until she was laying on the pavement, wondering how the hell she was alive and they were still stuck in the car, burning to death. _

"Paige," She could hear someone calling her from the distance but she refused to open her eyes for fear that the tears she'd been desperately holding back, would finally spill out. "Paige!" They were calling her again and she wasn't entirely sure if it was in her head or not, but she still refused to move, refused to look and see just _who_ it was.

"Paige, open your eyes damn it!" It was Piper. Swallowing the sob, she shook her head and felt her older sister pull her into a seated position before lightly tapping her left cheek. "Paige, look at me!" She hissed.

Taking in a rather shaky breath, Paige opened her eyes but immediately adverted them to the ground, not wanting to see the reaction on Piper's face. "Paige," She whispered, feeling as if someone had rather kicked her in the stomach. "Come home, please?"

Looking up, Paige bit down on her lip and sniffled-glancing into her sister's eyes. She wanted to do nothing more than go home, but she still felt that pull at her heart-that invisible force keeping her from leaving. "Paige, you cannot just stay out all night. And, why do you smell like whiskey?" Piper asked, confusion evident. However, her confusion quickly turned into shock as she realized what her baby sister had done.

"Paige! No, no, no-" She murmured, face in hands. "Tell me you didn't?"

When she got no answer, Piper moaned unhappily. "Oh Paige, why? You were so hell bent on not drinking, I just don't get it. What _happened_?" Sniffling, Paige felt her eyes dripping with tears. She'd tried so damn hard not to cry, but she couldn't stop it. As the tears dissolved into heart wrenching sobs, she found herself shaking her head until Piper had scooped her up into her arms, rocking her back and forth.

"C'mon sweetie," She whispered soothingly. "Let's go home; we can talk more about this there. Okay?"

As Piper helped her to her feet, she hadn't realized how emotionally and physically drained she was, barely having the energy to nod her head. Weakly dragging herself towards the stairs, she held onto Piper, her arm weakly draped around her older sister's shoulders. As they reached the car, Paige felt her knees giving out-and Piper swiftly and quickly opened the door and slid her in before she could fully collapse to the ground. Buckling her in, Piper closed the passenger door on her sister, ran around to the driver's side and jumped in the seat, wanting nothing more than to just go home and talk to Paige.

"Piper," She heard her baby sister whisper. Shooting her a quick glance, she shot back a rather quick reply.

"Yes?"

"I…I'm sorry." Paige croaked, tears clogging her voice.

"I know you are, sweetie. I know you are."


	4. Part IV

**Author's Note: **I've had too much time and yet not enough on my hands to fully write or prepare another installment, so if this seems rather dry and boring, well…that's because it is. Regardless, tell me what you think. Love it, hate it, I don't really care. Also, let's just say Darryl stays friends with the Halliwell's and that he never takes the job in Seattle.

….

"Paige, I think we should talk about what happened earlier," Piper said softly as she placed her baby sister in her bed. Her eyes were drooping and Piper knew it was only a matter of time before she passed out.

"Not now," She moaned, placing a hand to her throbbing head. "I have the headache from hell and my mouth feels like sandpaper. I just want to sleep." Sighing unhappily, Piper nodded her head, a hand resting on her hip as she stood over her baby sister's bed, watching as Paige curled herself up into a fetal position.

"Well, you might not be feeling like this if you hadn't consumed a whole bottle of Jack Daniel's." She snapped, her voice bordering between concern and anger. Groaning once more, Paige shook her head.

"Please, not now Piper. Just let me _sleep_, you can bitch at me later."

"Paige," Piper began, exasperated. "I'm not bitching, I just want to know _why_ you did it."

"I'm sorry, it was a stupid mistake." She mumbled, her tone clearly unconvincing. Piper scoffed, rolling her eyes.

"Damn right it was!" She hissed. "What the _hell_ were you thinking Paige?"

"I don't know!" Paige shouted angrily, as she pulled herself into a seated position. "It was stupid, I'm stupid, okay? Is that good enough for you? You're little sister's a fuck up." Eyes brimming with tears, Piper took a seat beside her baby sister and pulled her into a hug.

"No, you're not. You're a smart, sweet, gorgeous girl with a big heart. I don't ever want to hear you say something so _vile_ about yourself again. Understand?"

Sniffling, Paige nodded and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand before dropping her head back onto Piper's shoulder. She felt safe when Piper hugged her like this, she felt at home, as if all the bad things in the world just simply melted away. She felt home.

"Paigey," Piper croaked, her tone serious but masked due to the tears clogging her throat. "I love you alright? Don't you ever think otherwise, okay? However, I do think you should talk to mom and Grams, even try talking to Prue again. After all, you owe them that much. Listen to what they have to say, you never know-they might surprise you."

Chewing nervously on her lip, Paige nodded. She felt like a little kid again, being scolded by her mother for doing something wrong or making a mess. But that's just the thing, she wasn't a little kid and this _wasn't_ her mother. This was her older sister whom she'd only found out about two years ago.

"I can't, Piper." She whispered, a fresh set of tears pouring from her eyes like faucets.

"Why not?" Piper questioned. She didn't understand why Paige was refusing to speak to anyone all of a sudden.

"I just…_can't_."

"Paige…"

"No!" She shouted, ripping herself out of her older sister's embrace as her anger slowly bubbled back up to the surface. "You don't get it! None of you _fucking _get it! I can't talk to _any_ of them! I don't _want_ too!" Piper sighed in defeat, running a hand through her hair.

"Why _not_?" She pressed. She wanted an answer damn it and she wanted it now!

"Because!" Paige retorted, shaking her head. "I _can't_."

"You can't ignore them forever though, Paige. You need to talk to them sometime!"

"No," She snapped, jumping to her feet. "I don't." Her head was throbbing worse than before now and she felt as if there was an invisible band around her chest, cutting off her air supply. It grew tighter and tighter until Paige's eyes went wide and she was clutching her shirt in pain. Piper jumped up immediately at what she saw and rushed to her younger sister's side, rubbing her back soothingly, trying to whisper words of comfort into the red head's ear. However, the red head wasn't listening, the buzzing sound having returned from before, only this time-much more prominent.

Pushing Piper away again she stumbled out of the room and into the bathroom, locking the door behind her as she gripped onto the sink, staring at herself in the mirror. Hot tears poured down her face again and she was shaking uncontrollably. The bone-crushing pressure wasn't going away and she wanted to scream but nothing came out.

After a few more minutes of short, staggered breaths, the pain in her head slowly eased and the bone crushing pressure dissipated until it was just a dull thump. As the buzzing sound cleared, she could hear Piper on the other side, calling for her to open the door.

Not wanting to move for fear of passing out, she stayed where she was, trying to even out her breathing again. Moments later, when she was sure she would be okay to walk a few steps, she reached out and unlocked the bathroom door, instantly regretting it when she felt her stomach flip. Turning swiftly on her heel, she dropped to her knees, emptying her stomach into the toilet as her hands gripped each side of the white, porcelain bowl tightly.

A small, 'Oh Paige,' escaped Piper's throat as she rushed towards her younger sister, holding back her hair and rubbing small circles on her back. Paige was pale and shaking, the tears from before still pouring from her eyes as she continued to dry heave. It was like this for another hour until Paige finally felt well enough to pull her head out of the toilet and lean back against the tub. Telling her younger sister that she'd be back, Piper quickly disappeared from the bathroom and nearly sprinted down the stairs, grabbing a empty cup from one of the cabinets. Dismissing the confused looks from Phoebe, Prue, her mother and Gram's, she quickly ran back up the stairs and back to the bathroom where Paige was. Filling the cup with water, she handed it to the red head and watched as she took delicate sips, wincing lightly before she felt a cold cloth on her head, something else she figured Piper must have materialized when she'd disappeared.

Croaking out a small 'thank you,' followed by a remorseful apology, Paige closed her eyes, the exhaustion of the past few hours finally seeping into her. Hooking Paige's arm around her waist, Piper brought the young red head to her feet, nearly dragging her back to her bedroom and placing in her bed before Paige's eyes drooped shut and she was out cold. Sighing in defeat, Piper shook her head and slid with ease out of the room, closing the door with a soft click before descending back down the stairs and into the kitchen.

"What was _that_ about?" Phoebe asked as she watched her older sister drop into the chair beside her, exhaustion evident on her features. Piper shook her head, not wanting to repeat herself but knowing that she'd just be bombarded with more questions if she didn't.

"Paige was hungover," She murmured, a small yawn escaping her.

"Wait, what? She was hungover?" Phoebe asked, surprised.

"Yes, Phoebe, that's what I just said." Piper retorted, a dull tone escaping her mouth. She saw a look of hurt flash across her little sister's face and sighed, apologizing. Turning her attention over to her mother and grandmother, she cleared her throat.

"So uhm, what were you all discussing while I was gone?" She asked nonchalantly.

"Paige," Phoebe mumbled quietly. "I was explaining to mom, gram's and Prue that I didn't know what was going on with her lately. She's seemed on edge and more…I don't know, _jumpy_, then usual."

Nodding her head in understanding, Piper spoke again.

"I know, she practically had an aneurism when I tried to ask her a few simple questions." She snapped, dryly. She didn't want to go into detail about what or who the questions were about, for sake of feelings being hurt.

"Oh," Phoebe added. "Well, now that you're here-I think we should talk about the living arrangements."

"Okay," Piper muttered, fighting to keep her head propped up with her hand and her eyes open. "Where's Andy?" She asked suddenly, noticing he was nowhere to be found.

"Oh, he went to go speak with Darryl." Arching an eyebrow in confusion, Piper glanced at Phoebe.

"What do you mean he went to go speak with Darryl? Don't you think someone should've gone with him?" Piper snapped.

"Please," Phoebe snorted. "He'll be fine. I'm not entirely sure I can say the same for Darryl but I'm sure once he gets over the initial shock of it, that everything will be peachy keen."

"Okay, whatever you say."

"So," Prue piped up, taking a moment to glance at the amused expressions her mother and grandmother wore. "What now? I mean, with Paige. What now?"

Piper shrugged in defeat. "I don't know, I really don't."


	5. Part V

"Well, good morning to you too sunshine," Phoebe mused playfully as she watched Paige emerge from her room. Scowling, Paige pushed past her at lightning speed, her stomach turning at full force before she collapsed in the bathroom, dry heaving violently.

"Paige," Phoebe's voice was soft, and full of worry and concern. "Paige, are you okay in there? You don't sound too great." Bouncing on her heels, Phoebe waited for the sound of retching to stop before turning the doorknob and walking in. Her face fell at the sight of her baby sister hunched over the toilet, tears pouring from her eyes.

"Oh sweetie," She choked out, jogging towards her. Paige looked up at Phoebe, a blank stare on her face as her body trembled and a moan of pain elicited from her throat. Scooping the younger girl into her arms, Phoebe rocked her back and forth slightly, whispering sweet nothings into her ear.

"Shh, you're alright Paigey. You're alright."

Shaking her head, Paige sniffled, immediately tensing up again when she felt her stomach lurch violently for the second time. Leaning forward, she rested her face in her hands as she swallowed back the bile creeping up in her throat, willing herself to calm down.

"I just want to die," She croaked miserably. Phoebe shifted her weight, rubbing soothing circles on Paige's back as she shook her head in protest.

"Don't say that Paige, you'll feel better soon-I promise."

"No I won't." She sobbed, "I'm such an idiot!"

"Paige," Phoebe started, voice cautious. She'd had a feeling for awhile that whatever was bothering Paige was much deeper then what was on the surface. "What's going on? Talk to me honey, please!"

"You don't get it." She managed, voice raspy as she continued to lean over the toilet, pleading silently with whatever god was listening to make the madness she was feeling, stop. "I can't…I can't tell you. I can't tell any of you because you…you've never…" She stopped short as she felt the bile rise back up in her throat, gripping the edge of the toilet as she heaved into it again, knuckles turning a deadly white from her grip.

Phoebe sighed once more, knowing that this was a lost cause. If Paige wanted to talk, she would and as much as it killed Phoebe to be left in the dark, she knew that she'd have to wait it out and let Paige come to her on her own terms.

She just wasn't quite sure when that would be.

….

Defeat was running through every vein in her body as Phoebe plopped into a chair in the kitchen. She made no effort to speak to anyone, keeping to herself as she let the range of emotions she was currently feeling over her terrified, weeping baby sister to consume her. It took everything she had not to break down at the table though she couldn't help but let a few tears slip out-and Piper noticed immediately, stopping what she was doing to take a seat beside her younger sister. Reaching out, she placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, with Phoebe being an empath, she knew it had to be that much harder on her than it was for anyone else.

"I take it you talked to Paige?" Piper questioned, watching as the smaller brunette shook her head.

"Piper," Phoebe cried softly. "I just don't know what to do about her anymore, about any of this! I…I want to help to her so bad but she keeps refusing!"

"I know, sweetie, trust me-I do. But you can't help anyone who's not willing to be helped, let alone help themselves first."

Nodding again, Phoebe sighed and wiped furiously at her eyes the moment she heard footsteps. Glancing down at her hands, she momentarily saw a flash of jet black hair from the corner of her eye.

"Everything alright in here?" Prue questioned, feeling the tense aurora that surrounded the two younger women. Clearing her throat, Piper plastered on what had to be the cheapest and fakest smile alive before nodding her head.

"Yes, of course. Uhm, where's mom and grams?" She asked quickly, heading back to the counter to finish working on breakfast.

"They're upstairs in the attic, looking at the book of shadows. Where's Paige?"

Biting down on her lip, Phoebe swallowed the lump in her throat and tried desperately to relax, or at least make it seem as if she was. Piper noticed the silence from Phoebe and spoke up again.

"She's upstairs, she wasn't feeling too great this morning. Pancakes?" She questioned, quickly changing the subject as she held up a plate of pancakes in front of her. A slight chuckle fell from Prue's throat and she nodded her head.

"Yeah, sure-thanks Piper." Grinning widely, Piper quickly let her attention fall back into her cooking, leaving Prue to deal with the all-too silent Phoebe who was still staring at her hands.

"Morning Pheebs."

"Morning," She choked out weakly, voice laced with tears. Prue sensed this and quickly set her pancakes to the side.

"Phoebe, what's going on?" She asked delicately, not wanting to upset the younger woman obviously more so than she already was.

Shaking her head, Phoebe shrugged it off, giving her eldest sister a small smile before looking away.

"Nothing," She whispered. "Just tired, is all. I'm fine, really."

"Phoebe?" She questioned, knowingly.

"Yes?" The brunette retorted, eyes narrowed. She was growing rather agitated by the minute and Prue giving her the fifth degree wasn't helping at all.

"You're a horrible liar." Sighing, Phoebe nodded.

"I know."

….

She refused to move from her bed again, she didn't have the energy. She ached all over and her head was spinning incessantly. Her stomach had finally calmed down to an extent but she wasn't in the mood to test it and see what happened. She couldn't, or else she'd spend another two hours in front of the toilet.

Blankets tucked in and around her, Paige felt as if she was in a cocoon, which for her was a good thing. In a cocoon she was safe, she didn't have to worry about the questions or the demons chasing after her constantly, in a cocoon she was alone-and right now, that was the best thing in the world.


End file.
